Rowan Lockhart-Reese (Hades)

HAPPY ST. PADDY'S DAY!

LET'S GET FUCKED UP!

Some guy asked me to tattoo a piece of shit on his arm.

Yeah.

Fucking weirdos.

I really don't fucking get this whole Thanksgiving thing you Yanks are going on about. Who doesn't want to eat food? Bah.

Mick.

Can you come and get me? I'm going home.

IF I DON'T GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE I AM GOING TO GO FUCKING POSTAL

I have been stuck here for a fucking month and Sadie and Jake are really nice fucking people but I want to get out. I want to be able to fucking walk again. They say that even when all of my fucking bones heal that it'll take a fucking year. A whole fucking year or more before I can walk again. I have to re-learn how to fucking walk.

And he doesn't fucking remember me. Not only that but everyone's trying to make him think he's someone else. He's always bringing me things, which would be fine if he was any other man. He's being fucking nice to me and I don't know how to handle that.

The one thing I want to do is fucking leave and I can't.

I swear to god I'm going to snap.

I'm alive. Barely. And conscious.

( Allena )

( Private )

I hate just lying here.

I don't have anything to say. I'm in a hotel. I guess I've got to find a new place to live.

Anyone want a roommate?

And look, I don't even have to resort to name calling.

Seems like everyone is packing up and moving these days. Guess I don't blame them though. But I am moving out of the country. Never been out of the country until just recently. Went over to the States for a trip and came back with a plan to move there, believe it or not.

Not only that but I've been given the keys to my very own studio. I'm going to draw there, paint there, maybe put up a gallery. But I've also been thinking about making it a tattoo parlor. I haven't tattooed myself, but I do know some really good tattoo artists who I could come and get to work for me.

It's going to be very surreal leaving here though, and to have an actual legitimate job and get paid for it? I don't know what I'll do with myself.

You know, I quit the whole hooking thing but my phone's been ringing off the hook. Guys upon guys who want me for Saturday.

I'm half tempted to say yes. Maybe I can schedule it and be busy all damn day.

Fuck I hope they don't make me wear anything stupid.

There was a guy who OD'd in front of me today. All that foaming at the mouth shit and sweat. It was straight out of Pulp Fiction I swear.

And no, he didn't get back up. And people wonder why I don't do that shit.

I've taken up smoking again though, so I guess I'm pretty dumb.

I need the fuck out of this house.

Is it just me or are kids popping up all over nowadays. It's sad when I'm not even 30 and I'm feeling ridiculously old.

You guys make me feel old. Thanks for that.

I miss my job. I haven't had an appointment in weeks.

Oh sex, how I miss you.

[Blocked from cops and the like]

I've got some really good shit though if anyone wants to buy. Better then the normal stuff even.

[/blocked]

Christ I am bored. It's 4 am. I think it's time for a drink and a trip to the 24 hour ice cream place.

Oh and Jake, thanks for the present. I still haven't used it but then Craig's a slippery bastard.

I don't know if anyone's come over to my place looking for me. If you have lately you've noticed I'm not there. I've moved. Well sort of.

I'm not too far away but I'm not sure I'm gonna be going home. I doubt it. My lease is probably up and technically I've been forbidden to go home. Go figure. It's complicated. Isn't it always?

So anyway if you need me, call me I guess. That's the best way to get in touch and then I can tell you where I am.

Meanwhile let's play Ask Rowan. Ask me anonymously or straight out. I'll answer any question as best as I can with completely honesty as how I see it. Ask advice or fuck whatever else you want.

Go on, you know you want to.

I don't get you Americans still celebrating the massacre of nearly an entire race. But then, us Europeans have been doing it for a lot longer, and all we have is Boxing Day and Guy Fawkes day and that's not nearly as fun.

I've never had pumpkin pie. Or cranberries. Go figure.

So what are all the non-Americans doing? For the.. five of us that seem to not live there.

Spending time in jail wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. But then I didn't get to be anyone's bitch and really only had to deal with one chick who just would not get off the toilet to save herself in front of everyone. She had some serious digestive problems. But it could always be worse. I didn't get knifed or raped or anything. Imagine that. Anyway though, jail should be avoided when you don't have any money to bail yourself out and there's no one there to actually put up money.

I guess I'm lucky I didn't have that problem. I still want to know how the hell he knew though Now I'm back to home sweet home. If I went and put something in here about me killing someone I wonder if anyone would even pay attention enough to read it. Ah well. Back to leading the good life, if that's what this is. I'm sure the worst people have to worry about around here is people sleeping with their boyfriends and girlfriends. If they only knew how simple that shit really is.

[private]
I've killed someone. And I don't know what to do about Craig. Or is there anything to do about him? Neither of us is exactly mentally stable. He calls the shots though, I guess I just have to wait and see.
[/private]

It feels like I haven't been out of the house in ages. I guess I have though, I mean I've had clients. Lots of them actually. Money's good lately. It always feels like the shoe's going to drop any minute now. I've heard they've been doing busts lately. If I don't answer for a while, assume that I've been arrested.

I don't have anyone to pay my bail. I mean I have the money probably, just no one to do it for me. A lack of friends does that I guess.

Wish me luck.

I'm feeling much better now actually. I had bronchitis pretty bad, which meant no smoking. God that was horrid, trying not to smoke, though really I felt so fucking bad that I didn't want to smoke anyway, so I guess thank god for small favors or some shit like that.

You know, lots of people would tell me that my life is filled with fucking drama, but most of the shit I read in here doesn't compare. Who cares about getting all fucked up in some crack den when you guys are much more interesting.

I'm thinking I should do another round of Ask Rowan.

I need a fucking cigarette.

Christ I don't think my head could hurt any worse. It feels like my brain's been bashed in with a two by four. I'm not even hung over, what the hell? I'm not even sure I'm typing the right words on this thing. If it makes absolutely no sense then just send help or something. Maybe I should get drunk, that might make the pain stop. But it's like 12:30 in the afternoon, what the fuck is that about?

When the fuck am I even up at noon? Not in like ten years.

Maybe I'm getting sick. How do I not have someone here to take care of me and wait on me hand and foot?

Just fantastic.

It's one of those nights where I can't fall asleep to save my life. I guess that's what happens when you take too much E and didn't get home until 2 am. Three's kind of early though, at least in some parts of the world.

What are you even supposed to write about in these things? Here I know, someone ask me some questions. Whatever you want, I'll see if I can answer them. It'll be like Dear Abby, except it'll be Dear Rowan. Advice, how to make a peanut butter and jelly, whatever the fuck you want.

I guess this means I gotta go open google, I just know some smartass is gonna ask me what the capital of some country I've never heard of is.

Right, shutting up now.

Someone ask me somethin.